Currently: So I have failed my first Fieldwork 2 placement...according to my supervisor, it is because I wasn't "open" enough. I personally think that his reasoning for failing me was pure bullshit, and here's why: 1) When I had initially asked him and my douchebag, dickheaded other supervisor how they determined whether or not a student passed or failed, they both answered that as long as a student came to the facility, did their work, and didn't hurt or injure any patient, they passed them...I did EXACTLY that, and YET they found petty, bullshit reasons to fail me, which proves that they were lying to me from day one, 2) My first supervisor, the dickhead LIMITEDLY supervised me, yet EXPECTED me to do everything 100% like a practitioner...my other supervisor even addressed that during one of our meetings, and YET held everything I was lacking against ME! 3) In my opinion, patients should come first in this equation, and I always treated my patients with the upmost respect, and they all seemed satisfied with my services. I even had one patient who spat at and disrespected all the CNA's, nurses, and LPN's, but LOVED me. 4) We had practitioners at my facility who made THE SAME EXACT mistakes as I did, and yet at the end of the day, they were still practitioners, they still kept their jobs, but you're going to fail me? There was even one covering practitioner who was an OTR, not just a OTA, but an OTR, and didn't know what the hell she was doing. She would literally give patients one activity to do which didn't even HELP them in terms of their diagnoses, and she got away with it. She even asked ME for help at times, especially with documentation. And YET, she gets to keep her fancy license and make the big bucks year by year, but I get the middle finger. My point in bringing people like her up is; if they got a chance to be who they are today, then I deserve one too. Anyways, the next step for me is, I will still be able to go on my Pediatrics rotation, so it's not a complete loss. Afterwards, I am still allowed to go back to school to finish off my final semester of classes, and I would even be able to walk in the graduation ceremony. But here's where the catch comes in. After I graduate, I would have to stay in PA to do an additional rotation in the physical disabilities field. If I would pass that rotation, I would then officially earn my Masters. It's a decent idea for me, considering what happened at this last facility, but I still have a lot of things to think about, like where to stay and how to get to my job, and if I should get an additional job to cover expenses. I have also been thinking to myself; "Is it REALLY worth it?" According to my last supervisor, I pretty much don't even have the "personality" to be a practitioner, so if that's the case, why bother? Also, this rotation made me realize how shady and full of shit this profession REALLY is, and I am not a shady person. I really don't know. My fieldwork coordinator doesn't want me to make any "rash" decisions, and I see where he is coming from. But at the same time I feel that the decision I *want* to make may be the best one for me. I don't know anymore...about anything. One thing's for sure; I REALLY have to do well on my Pediatrics rotation, otherwise...
P.S. I gave one of my temporary supervisors (the same one who co-signed stabbing me in the back) a thank you card, so he gave me one of his own with $50 in it. I have a feeling he thought to himself "This girl is going to need a drink after she's done with us, so let me give her a little something..." And you know what? That's exactly what i'm going to do with it, thank you very much sir.
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