Saturday, May 1 , 2010

Currently: Wow...is it REALLY already May???? Holy shit! Which means quite a few things; i'll be graduating in 7 days, my brother's 25th birthday is in 30 days, and 15 days until I go to Florida!!!! This month is going to be ridiculous, I could feel it already...but i'm so ready for it!= )This coming week alone will be ridiculous. On monday, I have my Pediatrics final and then I have to stop by the occupational therapy department's secretary office to at least TRY to finalize all my fieldwork level 2 information, tuesday I have to go by the local church to drop off my tv (i'm donating it to charity), wednesday is the occupational therapy Bar crawl PLUS Jenn wants to hang out and go to the Karaoke Bar one last time, thursday SHOULD be a laid back day, but who knows? Friday I have work in the morning, my mother is arriving in town in the afternoon, AND I have the SENIOR Bar crawl to attend in the evening...and then Saturday I have morning mass and then i'll finally be GRADUATING by 2 p.m.= ) Yes, crazy week, nevertheless, but as I said before, I am SO ready!= )

Thursday, Apr. 29, 2010

Currently: I think that the most heart-breaking thing about my life is the fact that only one person in this entire world genuinely cares about me. If I were to drop dead tommorrow, or hell, even today, the only person that would have mercy on my soul is my mother...and only because it is her duty to feel such a way about me. Everyonelse would forget about me the next day. And the worst part is, I just know for a fact that I am not exaggerating. Now aint that a bitch?

Sunday, Apr. 25, 2010

Currently: This weekend wasn't bad. Went out friday night and last night and had a pretty decent time, I could say. Anyways, back to the grind. I'm trying to be as productive as I could be today. This morning I took out the trash (which is something I rarely do, oops) and cleaned my dining room table (which I was putting off for the day I move out)and now I am at work trying to continue with the productivity...but it's getting harder and harder as the hours roll by. I have two competencies this week for Physical Disabilities, and i'm trying to get started on reviewing for them, but for some reason my brain would rather zone out and think of other things, like what new haristyle to get when I get home (cause i've decided on not cutting my hair anymore)and what things to buy at the mall before my trip to Florida. I kind of want to knock myself in the head and say "SNAP OUT OF IT!!" I guess I just have to push myself harder. Anyways, after i'm done here, i'm going back to my apartment and doing some laundry as well as continuing on studying. My physical disabilities professor emailed us today saying that whoever does well on this week's competencies will not have to take the final exam...so needless to say, I REALLY MUST push myself to do well on this. I'm on my final stretch, afterall, and what better way to boost my confidence before this big crazy summer??

Thursday, Apr. 22, 2010

Currently: I have been having really strange dreams lately. A couple of nights ago, I had a dream that I was on a bus, looking out the window, when all of a sudden I see this young caucasian guy run towards a Bus in front of mine (i'm assuming purposely, cause he appeared suicidal), and then gets run over by that Bus. The freaky part is, I witness the entire gorey ordeal, and can even see when his head snaps off of his body and rolls under the Bus. That dream truly freaked me out, but it didn't end there! Last night I then have a dream that I am on the phone with somebody and out of nowhere, pull out a pair of scissors and start trying to cut both of my ear lobes off! What-the-hell???? My Big sister decided to google my last dream to see what it meant, and according to her findings, it meant that I am expecting some bad and/or offending news in the near future. Seriously? I don't need anymore stress and unfortunate things in my life. I really hope for my sake that the meaning of my dreams are untrue. I'm not stressing too much about it, though. Anyways, I should really get to bed now, as a busy day awaits me tommorrow. I am working from 8 'til 12, then have Clinical Reasoning, where i'll be doing my case study presentation...YAY! Not. Well, at least i'll be getting paid tommorrow. G'night!

Tuesday, Apr. 20, 2010

Currently: Jenn definitely must have felt bad about Saturday night, cause she randomly called me last night to hang out.Haha And of course, I couldn't say no. I did finish my homework at that point, afterall...and why not? That was only my SECOND time ever going out on a Monday night, so I was up for trying something new.Haha The Bar we went to actually had quite a few people in it, which I wasn't expecting at all. But it was nice. Her friend Ashley(aka the girl in our sorority that I hate the most)tagged along...and surprisingly, we ended up chatting it up quite a bit last night. It was pretty...weird.Haha It all started when I felt comfortable enough to say one little thing to her. And before we knew it, we were joking about people and talking about practically anything. I even asked her about her true feelings about me...i'm sorry, I had to! And that rum and coke in my system pushed me towards it even more, haha. And I don't know if she bull-shitted because she felt uncomfortable, or if she was really genuine, but she then tells me that she never had anything against me and thinks that i'm a lot of fun to hang out with. She then apologized for ever making me feel uncomfortable...but you know that'll happen again anyways.Haha But hey, it was nice being buddies for at least one night...she even mentioned something about possibly hanging out over the summer...I REALLY chuckled at that.Haha. So needless to say, last night really made up for saturday, thank god. Anyways, I have a little bit of a dilemna tonight. See, my mother is currently in Haiti visiting her siblings, and the problem with that is that when she had told me that she was planning to do this months ago, I was STRONGLY against it, and pretty much gave her an ultimatum; them or me. So then she tells me that she'll "think about it," and let me know of her decision as soon as she figures it out. So months and months pass by, and she doesn't bring this up at all...and then all of a sudden, last week i'm speaking to her on the phone when she adds "oh yea, i'm leaving for Haiti on monday." WHAT THE FUCK???!!! It's pretty obvious that she went against her promise and DID NOT let me know of her plans as soon as she made them. I was so upset at her. I even temporarily un-invited her to my graduation. But then I felt bad and re-invited her. So she arrived over there yesterday, and before I could even have a real conversation with her, my father calls me to tell me that she has given my old laptop to her brother in law...WHAT THE FUCK...AGAIN???!!! See, over the summer, before embarking back to school, I asked her what she was planning on doing with my old laptop and she told me that she didn't know. Months go by again and she doesn't tell me a thing about her plans...and then I hear THIS! I am not upset about the fact that she let him have my old laptop, but at the fact that she pretty much decided to just give away something that once belonged to me without my permission. Once again, she went behind my back and did something against my will. You have no idea how upset that made me. So I was speaking to her today about how upset she has made me with this entire Haiti trip ordeal, and she doesn't really offer any kind of apology, but instead tried to make ME out to be the bad guy. She then has the nerve to ask me for my classmate Cara's number (Cara's a missionary to Haiti, what a fucking coincidence!) so that she could give it to her brother in law so he can have a contact person for some sort of charity that he's trying to start. But I just refused to do it, because I am still very upset at her and her relatives...mostly cause I feel she is choosing them over me at this point. So after I decline, she gets all weepy-voiced and starts begging me saying that he's trying to do something good with this, and blah blah blah...and I just wasn't having it because at this point I am tired of being nice and getting stepped on. The problem though is, now I kinda feel bad about rejecting her so aggressively. So here's my dilemna; be nice, and hand over my contacts, but continue to get stepped on, or be a bitch and continue to feel guilty about it. Only time shall tell on this one. Other than all that madness, life's been alright to me. It's almost graduation time and i'm really excited...but have a lot of work to finish before I could truly enjoy it.Haha After finals week, the girls in my class and the graduate class are having a Bar crawl and i'm planning on going to that. I also have a lot of finalizing and what not to do. And even after I graduate, I already have SO MUCH planned for the summer, including my Fieldwork II rotations. I guess that would be my welcome to the grown up world.

Sunday, Apr. 18, 2010

Currently: Last night was...interesting, to say the least. So I am sitting home, trying to figure out what to do for the night (as I usually spend my entire saturdays doing), and I decide to text Jenn to see what she's doing. She texts me back saying she's going to hang at the Pike house for the night with her Little. I, at first, try to sway her into changing her mind and going to the Karaoke Bar instead, but she practically insists, saying her little wanted to hang at the Pike house, blah blah blah...and I feel bad kind of keeping her from hanging out with her little, so I agree. She tells me to meet them at the Pike house...by myself. Now, Jenn doesn't usually have me just meet her at a place by myself, so that right there should have clued me in that she wasn't in the greatest of moods, but I decided to go over and meet her anyway. Needless to say, the walk over there was hell. This fraternity house is a good distance away from my apartment bulding, and the lighting in the area it is located at is very poor, so walking for that long, in a dark, isolated area, scared the shit out of me. I swear, I felt like that was the longest, scariest walk I ever had to take. So I get there finally, having survived the walk of hell, and you would think that after going through all of that crap to meet up with her, that Jenn would show at least a little bit of appreciation, but that was not the case. I try to strike a conversation with her, and she just gives me an attitude and is passive and just looks away from me and at her phone. At that point I was just like "erm, okay?" And to add some cherry to this fuck-you sundae, some of our other sorority sisters, the new girls, start showing up and give me this look like "what the fuck is SHE doing here?" Stuck up little cunts. So that, put together with Jenn being dumb for no reason, all makes me decide that it is my time to peace out. So I text my friend looking for a ride out of that hell hole, cause I sure as hell wasn't going to take ANOTHER hellish walk back home, and unfortunately, she is at her boyfrien's and doesn't have her car with her, so she couldn't pick me up, pretty much. I was so upset. After awhile, Jenn then comes back, I guess feeling bad for having given me an attitude previously, and offers to help me find some Beer to drink. She asks a few of the brothers if they have anything for me, and the lying bastards tell her that they don't, when I knew DAMN WELL that they had fucking Beer lying around in a little special compartment in their basement! And that, my friends, is why I do not like the Pikes. Finally, I get the guts to tell Jenn that I wanted the hell out of there, and if she'd be willing to give me a ride to a Bar nearby. I wanted to go to the Bar cause I figured, the night went shitty as it is, so why not at least end it with a little bit of happiness? So she then asks me if i'm sure I want to go to the Bar by myself (once again, GUILT!) and then apologizes for the party being so "lame." I blandly tell her "it's okay," and point out the Bar I wanted to be dropped off at. Once she pulls up at the Bar I tell her "ok, thanks for the ride," and she answers "no problem hun, if you need anything don't hesitate to call me." WOW! So I get into the Bar and have a cranberry and vodka drink and three swedish fish shots. I notice that two creepy looking middle aged men are kind of staring at me from across the Bar, but ignore them and go about my business. I am then hit on by some random Bar creeper (OF COURSE!) and he asks me if i'd like to go hang out at another nearby Bar/club with him and his friends...um, NO! He finally leaves me alone after awhile, though. At this point, I decided that I should just go take a piss and then walk home. So I get into the bathroom and as i'm waiting for a free stall, I bump into another one of my acquaintances/sorority sisters...my lucky night! Luckily, she was one of those sisters that I actually don't mind at all. Her name is Kelley. So she lets me hang out with her and her friends, and I actually have a pretty good time with them! One highlight would be my raunchy dancing session with her Marine corporal friend.Haha She was actually trying to hook me up with him, but honestly, I wasn't really that attracted to him, so I kindly declined. But another one of her friends, a very well-mannered Indian fellow by the name of Addy showed a little bit of interest in me, and took my number down. Kelley likes him for me as well, cause apparently he's LOADED. Hey, I wouldn't mind that. We finally decide to walk back home, and thankfully, since Kelley and I live in the same apartment building, I was able to walk with her the entire way. And that was my night. Last night did make me realize something though. As much as I put my life at risk last night (by walking all the way to an eerie fraternity house in the dark, by myself and then going to the Bar by myself), I was still able to find a way back home safely. 'Til now it astonishes me the way last night worked out. It kind of opened my eyes to faith and got me thinking "Eventhough I had given up on God a long time ago, it appears he surely hadn't given up on me." And you know what? I like that.

Friday, Apr. 16, 2010

Currently: The fact that I almost never get any drunk calls/texts makes me wonder; do I ever cross anyone's mind even at their moments of absolute euphoria?

Monday, Apr. 12, 2010

Currently: My sorority sisters are a bunch of idiots. Do they not get that the only reason our "Greek goddess" won the title this year was because we are working with the PIKES (aka, the most popular fraternity on campus that everyone in the Greek community bows down to, pretty much) for Greek Week? I mean, we've only ever won Greek goddess when we were working with them, and last year, when we did Greek week by ourselves, our Greek goddess was barely even noticed. I see through the shady politics of Greek organizations on campus, but they don't seem to get it. And the worst part of it is, THEY as well feel the need to bow down to the Pikes as if they are Gods sent straight from heaven or some shit. I swear, everytime even one Pike is in our mist, everyone feels the need to act a certain way and say certain things, as if to not offend them in any way. I, in the meanwhile, don't give a fuck. Whenever i'm around any Pike, I speak to him as I would speak to any other bone-headed fraternity boy. And here's the shocking part; they don't even mind! I actually bumped into one over the weekend. For some reason, he was sitting at our table at the Bar, and I didn't even try to strike up a conversation with him, but then he looks right at me and is like "Hey, I don't know you, what's your name?" I am not a rude person by nature, so I answered and we talked a little. We talked about him dropping out of Physical Therapy school, graduation, and him lying on his resume. It was actually a normal conversation. I didn't bat my eyebrows and go "Teehee, oh my god," like almost every sorority girl here does whenever they talk to any one of the chosen ones. It is NOT that serious! I even expressed this concern to Jenn while we were out. It's just ridiculous to me. I guess that's what popularity gets you. People. I get more and more disgusted by them everyday.
P.S. To the new Greek goddess: You wouldn't be SHIT without the Pikes, even if you did genuinely do a great job on your talent. Just remember that.
Too bad she will never read this.= )

Sunday, Apr. 11, 2010

Currently: I am not feeling so hot today. I have to work for 6 hours, have a group meeting, have a lot of studying to do, and am still worried about...stuff. *sigh* My stomach is literally in knots. Sometimes I really wish I had the power to look into the future and get a glimpse of what my life will be like then, just so that I at least know where all my hard work and anxiety is going to get me. Needless to say, today's one of those days where i'd rather just crawl into bed and hibernate until I feel like getting up again...but unfortunately, I have to keep things moving. Then again, it is my fault for CHOOSING to work during the weekend...I digress. Anyways, after work i'll be meeting up with my lab group to work on our Traumatic Brain injury lab project, and then i'll be back at the apartment studying and studying some more and then calling it a night and starting anew tommorrow. I was excited about summer coming up, but now I don't know. If it ends up being anything like last summer, I will freak out and physically hurt somebody. Woe, woe, woe.
P.S. I hate how some girls in my class think our major is SO hard! I was just on facebook, and one of the girls in my class wrote as her status; "Well...at least i'm lucky enough to go to school and learn complex material," and I really had to laugh at her. Are you kidding me? Hard? What if you were a medical student, what would you call it, impossible? I mean, i'm not going to lie, we do have a lot to study for our upcoming exam, but the material is really not hard at all! Dumbasses. And of course, it's people like that that manage to get ahead in life. I never mentioned how much I can't stand any of the girls in my class, did I? Well, there you go. I can't stand them and their little miss perfect selves. Just stop fucking complaining and get the fucking work done, you lazy cunts! *sigh* Ok, carry on...

Thursday, Apr. 8, 2010

Currently: I think as soon as I get home after graduation i'm going right to the Hair Salon and getting a hair cut/do JUST LIKE Taraji P. Henson's in "I can do bad all by myself." I kind of questioned it at first, but then realized that me and Taraji have the same shape of face, and seeing how she looked so kick ass with that hair cut, that probably means the same for me as well! I'm so excited! New decade, new me! Not only that, but later on in May, I may also be taking a little trip down to Florida to visit my crazy friend from freshman year whom I haven't seen in forever. This summer's going to be great.= ) Graduation, come already!

Tuesday, Apr. 6, 2010

Currently: I love how I know so many girls whose lives are all of a sudden "complete" once they have a guy in it...or am I speaking for myself as well? In that case, unlike them I DON'T have one in mine.= (
C'est la vie.

Saturday, Apr. 3, 2010

Currently: So it is Easter Break...and here I am in my apartment, pretty much bored. Today was a pretty good day, though. Early this afternoon I met up with my friend Clarice and me, her, her fiance, her mother, and her brother (full house, I know) went to K-mart, where I got myself some candy.= ) Afterwards, we went and saw the movie "Why did I get married too." It was a pretty good movie...then again, ANYTHING by Tyler Perry is amazing, so why am I even surprised? Afterwards, I came home and ordered some pizza...too bad it wasn't as good as I thought it was going to be, but i'll live. Right now i'm just hanging around and waiting to see if Clarice will be up for hitting the bars for a little bit. Right now, we are both on the fence about whether or not to go, because it appeared slightly stormy looking outside earlier. But thankfully, right now it looks like the clouds are going away and the sun has come out. We shall see. Anyways, tommorrow I really should get back to being a good student and doing some schoolwork. The past few days have been so nice around here, that I practically blew all homework off.Haha Bad girl, I know. But who could blame me? Right now, i'm not going to lie, I kind of wish I were home at a salsa Bar getting my Salsa on. I love salsa music and have acquired a whole new appreciation for it. Whenever I am at home at a salsa Bar, I just feel alive. I don't even have to dance to feel good, that's how great it is. Anyways, i'm rambling. Happy Bunny Rabbits appreciation Day!= )