Act Like a Lady...Think like a Man?

Hey Blog world...it really has been awhile, huh? Well, to any curious, inquiring mind out there; all's good for me right now. I am, of course, still exploring my place/role in this huge 'ole world. My trip to Vegas was very nice. Although I was supposed to meet up with my friend from California I ended up going alone. But of course I made the best of it. While there I went to see the male exotic dancer venue 'Thunder from Down Under' and even got to take a picture with the guys while sitting on one dancer's lap.haha I definitely showed that one off at work ; ) I also went on a sightseeing tour to the Red Rock Canyon at the outskirts of the strip. It is so beautiful and scenic out there...but oddly enough it also reminded me of those old Merrie Melodies cartoons featuring Wile E. Coyote and the Roadrunner.Haha, only me. I only spent a weekend over there but did a lot considering! Anyways, to segue into my Blog topic of the day...I have been reading a book by the comedian Steve Harvey called 'Act like a Lady, Think like a Man,' which had also been turned into a major Motion Picture. Of course I ended up seeing that movie and what really caught my attention about it and the book itself was the whole notion of finally figuring out why men act the way they do. As an individual who has never been in a relationship but feels deserving of one, I feel that this book has potentially crucial and important information that can lead me to understanding why I've never been in a relationship and what I may be doing wrong. So i'm reading the first chapter of the book and the very first thing that Steve delineates about men is that they are very simple, obvious creatures. In a way this information really shocked me, because all my life i've viewed them as even more complicated than us women! What also caught my eye was when he says that a man who has plans for a woman in his future (as a girlfriend, wife, etc.) is not afraid to give that woman a 'title' to his friends, family, and other important individuals in his life, whether it be 'my lady,' 'my girlfriend,' whatever. This fact was actually the most upsetting and hurtful to me because in the past i've dealt with men who merely referred to me as a 'friend' or 'Danielle' and refused to see me beyond those terms. I was never anybody's 'lady,' 'girl,' or 'girlfriend.' When I was a freshman in college, as a matter of fact, there was a guy I always hung out with and did boyfriend/girlfriend type things with...eventhough we were so close, he just REFUSED to consider me his girlfriend. To me I was, how he put it, 'a friend that I like to kiss.' And its not like i'm one of those whores who go around blowing any guy with a dick... I am and have always been a classy individual who carries myself well. So all these men who don't want to give me the respectful title I deserve really offend me. But anyways, I digress. I also found it interesting when he says that men have a different way of showing their love to us, meaning instead of cuddling 24/7 a man would rather show his love by not only giving a woman a title, but also doing things like making sure she is always safe, defending her honor, fixing anything she needs fixed, paying for dinner voluntarily, etc. Now this is new information to me, as I had always thought that men were very physical and as passionate-minded as us women. Shows how much I know, huh?haha In the book, Mr. Harvey goes on to give us gals advice on what to say, what not to say, and how to carry ourselves so that hopefully one day we can earn that ring and that good man. Some advice I already knew about, others are new to me. It is a good book, nevertheless. But although I am understanding men better, I can't help but still think that they're full of shit. As much as they say only 'special' women earn their respect, i've seen many girls with absolutely ZERO self-respect be in long-lasting meaningful relationships...with men that they don't hesitate to step on. I don't know what it is about those women. Hopefully Steve will have a chapter in the book dedicated to those women and why men seem to love them so much. As much as i've realized what men may or may not like, I am never changing who I am for anybody. I mean, it is not like any of them would ever change who they are to satisfy me! That, and i've been trying for the past 24 years of my life to figure out what kind of person I am and how I can change myself so that I can have more friends/ a boyfriend...I joined a Social Sorority for chrissakes! But almost all of my approaches to self-reconstruction have gone to no avail... so that has been my wake up call to the fact that I am who I am no matter what, and yes, I can make some alterations to my shy personality and my general outlook on life, but at the end of the day i'll never be that Social butterfly that people want me to be...that's just not who I am or was meant to be. This is my true demeanor; simple, witty, a little sarcastic, silly, curious...and I don't need a man to tell me that I SHOULDN'T be these things!